Can't deny, can't lie, can't really face the truth.

A quiet moment making my footprints on the sand.
A sweet feeling comes surrounding me.
It's delirious.
Now that's a sugar rush.
My heart is beating oh so fast,
And I dun wanna fall too deep but I want to make it last

There's no need to rush.
We can take our time. Let it go the natural way.
We begin as friends?
And who knows what ?
Where this could be taking me

In this nice cool breeze.
Yes I am all at ease.
When I gush.
And this sweet feeling comes to me.
Can't deny, can't lie, can't really face the truth.
And I wonder if you're feeling the same way too

You know what I would like?
I'd like to get to know you more.
Make that mutual.
Boy, you know you wanna know me too

This is how you make me feel.
When you're here, I feel your vibe,
And I hope I don't fall into deep too fast

You're not the type,
Who'll rush into things.
And let it slip away. Yeah,
I like your type.
Caught up in this ride.
It's kinda silly but I'll say

In this nice cool breeze,
Yes I am all at ease.
When I gush.
And this sweet feeling comes to me.
Can't deny, can't lie, can't really face the truth.
And I wonder if you're feeling the same way too

生氣

是，我生氣了。

Take a deep breath.

I don't exactly have a best friend who is easiest to deal with too.

ibunny!

Me: Daniel they all hate this bunny... they tell me don't bring to Thailand. Some more everyone ask me to wash it because it's so dirty.

Mum: Tell them it will go Thailand and cleanse itself in the holy river waters there.

Me: =,=

又回到這裡了

Interviewer 問我：不開心的時候會做甚麼？
我說：在河邊聽歌，走走，看看人。

所以，現在我就在那裡。
輕微的風，吹不開烏雲。

在尋找那所謂愛情的美好

六月二十三的上海

簡單的幸福，簡單的開心。

一路走來，路上看到了好多directional signs。但，路要怎麼走，還是靠自己感覺吧。路標只是個建議...甚至有時候太快的把你帶到目的地，讓你忽略，錯過。

六月二十二的上海

繼續在世博。Today I learnt the importance of contacts... to get you into pavilions without queueing hours!

知己。知己？對自己，有時候都看不到真心。

猶豫只會將夢想變模糊，最後被遺棄。學著勇敢追求夢想，昨天的夢就變成今天的現實。

六月二十一的上海

世博，我來也！

看著，學著，感受著。

六月二十的上海

(written on my handphone on a taxi ride)

今天下雨了。

比起過去兩天，今天的上海感覺好不一樣。

灰暗，水滴，雨傘，還有的士播放的老歌。

《感覺你的溫度，溫暖的過一切》

這生活，我喜歡。

六月十九的上海

瘋狂的shopping：訂做了四件上衣，兩件褲子和在 H&M 和 C&A 買了好多。

還有yuneng念念不忘的蟹粉炒蛋。這頓飯吃得很開心，88RMB。

六月十八的上海

匆匆忙忙的從burger king跑到我們的boarding gate，還被screen上所寫的 “gate closed” 嚇死了。幸好最後還是上了飛機。

五個小時，穿越雲海，把我帶到了另一個空間，另一個城市，另一個生活。

Off off OFF!!!

Finally, I'm gonna get to ride on a plane again! Seems like so long ago since I last took a plane!

Off, away from Singapore. That is what I always wanted. Away from all the noise, worries, thoughts. Just indulge in fun and laughter and brainless-ness. Of course, this time I can't escape from work and my dearest laptop will be visiting Shanghai with me.

I do look forward to the getaway time from Singapore though. Really need some space and time to think about my life: what I have done, what I am doing and what I will do.

----

看著freshmusic在錄podcast，好好玩，感覺好羨慕哦。總在想：為甚麼自己沒有一個肯定的目標，喜歡的也不去追求。現在的我，似乎漸漸的陷入懶散的生活，生命力也減少。希望，期望，夢想，妄想，都隨著時間淡了，生命奮鬥力減少了。從不讓現實打敗的我，漸漸的陷入現實中。好不喜歡這樣的自己，時常也會想著生命的意義。

但，生命的意義又是甚麼？是為了別人而活還是該為自己而活？是找到自己喜歡和想追求的還是賺錢過生活？是找到幸福和快樂？

曾經容易被滿足的我，現在再已不是。記得媽媽在我小時候老是對我說：Be contented，you are a lucky girl。帶著這個philosophy，我很容易感覺到contented，沒要求多。知道自己是lucky到不行，生活一直以來都很被照顧。可是我變了。不再容易被contented。Perfectionist的性格藏在深處：口頭上都ok，有時候心裡還真的不ok。

想來想去，結論都是：我還沒找到我的平衡點。How should I craft my lifestory?

I'm lost. In myself.

Email disease

Oh no! I thought I have recovered from my email disease, but seems like I haven't!! In the past week, with the increasing number of emails I'm sending, they have all 暴發 again:

1. Sending emails and forgetting to attach the document, hence have to send twice.
2. Sending emails and attaching the wrong documents, hence have to send twice.
3. Sending emails and typing in the wrong email address, hence have to send twice. (NEW)

Seems like I'm getting from bad to worse...

"Happy for u"

說說，都兩個月了。

朋友兩天前還剛問：“i thought u say it won't go past one month? two months very long already leh!"

說長也不算長吧，但也不短了。哈哈。

好多人的surprise，好多人的祝福。
好多人的鼓勵，好多人的支持。

在我懷疑自己的選擇時，看到了大家的肯定。
在我想放棄的時候都一直勸我給兩人個機會。

所以，不確定的感覺已漸漸消失。
在每個人的祝福下，我會勇敢的往前走。

不知道路會走多遠，但最後我知道我不會後悔，因為我曾試著走過。
當然，ibun 也會跟著我走這條路。所以先生，是時候學會愛屋及烏，多疼疼ibun了！

《飛天》

最近看演出，感覺上不是在看別人，而是在看自己。
好多熟悉的曲目。一首一首的，勾起埋藏在回憶的。

今天聽了飛天，想起了十四歲那年。

那年的我們對自己的程度還是有很多reservations的。
無意中華樂團進了決賽，所以選了《飛天》在決賽演奏。

那時的我們都覺得這是個瘋狂的選擇吧，況且《飛天》在那個年代是屬於比較 ”高級“ 的曲目。
練，練，練。最後我們成功的演奏飛天。

或許因為跟別人一起往前沖，都從沒停留來享受那時對華樂的熱誠。
所以今天聽到了《飛天》，看到的不是眼前的樂團，而是近十年前的一切。

那感覺，再也沒感覺到。所以我會牢牢的記著，華樂所給我的一切。

一個無聊的星期五

#1 game: Bowling for 2
1. Pick randomly from paper slips with 1-9 written on them (3 slips each).
2. Guess what the other person is holding, and try to hit those numbers of pins to win the game.

#2 game: Pool for 2
1. Pick randomly from paper slips with 1-15 written on them (5 slips each).
2. Guess the numbers that the other person has and try to down balls with those numbers.

Total spent: $16.50 for 3 hours. Though more expensive than usual activity of watching movie, this night was definitely more engaging than catching a boring movie!